Gay Dad Family Stories

Philippe "Swiped Right" on This Handsome Young Dad

At first, Philippe wasn't sure he could date a man who was a dad. But Steve, and his son Gabriel, have helped him realize a "fatherly side" of himself he didn't know he had.

"It's been one hell of a ride since the beginning," said 26-year-old Steve Argyrakis, Canadian dad of one. He was 19 when he found out he was going to be a dad and the mom was already several months along in her pregnancy. Steve, who lives in Montreal, was struggling with his homosexuality but wanted to do the "right thing," so he continued to suppress his authentic self. "I was so scared about the future and about my own happiness, that I had put aside my homosexuality once again."

A couple of months later, little Gabriel was born, and it was love at first sight.


But Steve's internal struggle was only getting harder. He recalls a friend asking him one day if he was happy. "I answered yes pretending that I was sincere since I was trying to convince myself that this life with a woman and a child was going to be my new life forever. Which meant an unhappy life forever." When his friend left that day, Steve thought for a long time about what he would do with his life.

Nine months after the birth of his son, 20-year-old Steve came out. He told the mother of their son and decided to live openly no matter what others would think. "I was scared, I was lost, and I needed a lot of love to go through this difficult journey." Since that moment, Steve remembers being a lot happier.

Steve's friends and family embraced who he was, and he and his ex share custody of Gabriel. They also split the major holidays such as Christmas and Halloween so they each get to celebrate with their son. But when it came to dating, Steve was a little apprehensive; until he met Philippe Amiot eighteen months ago.

They met on the Tinder app, and Steve was very open from the beginning about having a son. (He included photos of him on his profile but his face was covered by a smiley emoji to protect his identity.) At first, Philippe who turns 28 this month, was a little cautious upon seeing Steve with his son on his profile. He was unsure about dating a dad, but he decided to meet anyway as Steve seemed so kind and was very good looking. And he hasn't looked back.

"We had our first date in a restaurant and we both feel in love with each other right there," said Steve. "It was the beginning of our story."

A month after they began dating, Steve decided it was time to introduce Gabriel to Philippe. "He [Philippe] loved him from the very first day," Steve recalled.

"I remember one of our first activities with Gabriel was going to the Santa's Claus Village during summer time," shared Philippe. "It made me discover a fatherly side of me I didn't know... We played, had fun together and it made me realize that having a family could be something that I would like to be part of... A thought that I never had before."

Today, Philippe is very grateful and proud to be embraced as a second dad. "I'm really thankful to Steve and Gabriel for letting me being part of their family. I love seeing Gabriel growing up and I love to support Steve in the education of his son."

Since becoming a dad, Steve has learned a lot about himself and the importance of making his own happiness a priority. He's also learned a lot from his son. "Appreciate the present moments, don't take life to seriously and to keep my child's heart," he said. "Children are so pure and innocent, they have a lot to teach us."

"I think the three of us are going really well together and we're making each of us even more stronger everyday," added Philippe. "Happiness, powerful and love are the three words that come to my mind when I think about our little family."

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After finally coming out to my ex-wife after ten years of marriage (see previous articles for that story), and eventually telling my family I knew there was one more step I needed to make.

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I loved and do love every person who has ever come into my office and treat them like family. We laugh together during visits, celebrate wins, cry together, often hug, and cheer each other on regarding various things in our life. That's also a large part of who I am: a people person. I enjoy spending quality time with those I am privileged to help. No one comes in my office and only sees me for 2-5 minutes.

Even though there was so much good that I had built into my brand and reputation fear eventually found its way into my business too. I was afraid of what would happen if people found out the truth. Would they be okay with having a gay chiropractor? Would they still trust me to be able to help them? Of course, the story in my head I was telling myself was much bigger and badder than it needed to be.

When we decided to get a divorce, I felt strongly that I needed to face these fears and begin telling a number of patients the truth of what was happening in my life. I know in reality it is no one's business but my own. However, I felt like I needed to let my patients who had become like family to me truly see me for who I am, and who I always was. And so slowly, case by case, I began to tell a select number of people.

I'll never forget the first patient I told. She had been coming in for years and was bringing her son in to see me who is on the autism spectrum. It was the day after my ex-wife and I decided to get a divorce and she could tell something heavy was on my mind. I eventually came out to her. The first words out of her mouth were "I am so proud of you!" We cried and hugged and it was the complete opposite of what I ever expected. And it was perfect. I felt loved. I felt accepted. I felt seen.

As time went on it got easier. And overall the responses were all completely positive and supportive. Out of all the patients I told and those who found out from other circles, only three stopped coming in to see me. Since coming out, my office has grown tremendously. My reputation hasn't changed. If anything, it's solidified. I can't help but think that part of that is due to finally embracing all of me and allowing others the same opportunity.

I read somewhere once that you never really stop coming out of the closet. And I've noticed that too. Sure, not everyone needs to know; it isn't everyone's business. And I hope that one day we live in a time period where fear doesn't prevent anyone from being seen. I want to contribute to the upward trajectory I think our society is headed of understanding, acceptance, support, and equality.

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