Don’t Let Your Kid Be the Only Adopted One Around

Our final video in our series of speaking with April Dinwoodie.

Brian: Hi, it's Brian and we're here for our last video of this series with April Dinwoodie of the Donaldson Adoption Institute. Thanks for all the information you've given us in the other videos. Guess I want to end this series by asking you is there any parting advice you want to give to the dads watching.

April: So I think there is a few things: One, be bold, be brave, and talk about the stuff that doesn't feel so fun to talk about. That's good parenting advice. The second is don't let your kid be the only adopted kid around. What I would say about my own personal experience is that I was first introduced to another adopted people well into my adult years, and had friends for the first time who were other adopted people. It changed my life, and meeting birth parents for the first time; I had never known a birth parent before because I didn't get to connect to my biological mom, my birth mom. Meeting other birth moms and birth dads has changed my life tremendously.

Brian: Sorry to interrupt, but by that do you mean meeting others who gave their children up to adoption?

April: If they relinquished their children, if they made adoption plans for their children. In many years passed, it was more due to societal ill and some were taken from them. But my point is, differences of race, class and culture are really poignant and they give us a lot to learn about and talk about on behalf of our kids. But there is a bigger overlay building community around adoptive families, and having people to tap into. You may have a question Brian that only another adoptive dad can answer. And letting your kid see you as that kind of family that is around other families like that and having your kids see other kids that are adopted, it just makes it more organic and those relationships and those bonds with your children of those I've seen and my own personal history of meeting other adoptive people of the community ... it's transformational.

I would say, build a community and you're doing that with your site and getting people together who share a common experience, it's so powerful. So keep doing what you're doing, and I will come back talk and more if you'll have me, and I'm just grateful for the opportunity to share.

Brian: Thank you, we'd love to have you. We really appreciate you being here and bringing home some really great advice. Part of the reason we came up with Gays With Kids was for the opportunity to make sure that my children and other children can see other families that look just like their own. We could not be in more agreement or in alignment.

April, thank you so much. We will definitely come back to you. I appreciate your help, your expertise, and all your friendship and guidance.

Watch the first video of the series: What is a Transracial Family?

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