Politics

Gay Russian Dads Forced to Flee Moscow

Fearing the Russian government might take their adopted kids into custody because of their sexual orientation, Andrei Vaganov and Yevgeny Yerofeyev fled Moscow

A married couple in Russia, with two adopted children, were just forced the flee their home in Moscow for fear that the authorities would take their children away, according to German news site Deutsche Welle.

Trouble started last month after investigators in Russia opened a criminal inquiry into the proceedings that had allowed the gay couple, Andrei Vaganov and Yevgeny Yerofeyev, to legally adopt the two boys —adoption by LGBTQ people in Russia has typically not been recognized. The government became aware of the adoption proceedings after the gay couple brought their 12-year-old son to the hospital, who was complaining of a stomachache. The boy was fine, but after he mentioned offhand that he was adopted and lived with two fathers, the doctor called the police.

Andrei and Yevgeny granted an interview with Deutsche Welle after escaping Moscow, but on the advice of their lawyers have yet to disclose where they are currently located. Here is a quick recap of that conversation:

"In connection with the 'propaganda of non-traditional values,' the state representatives are accused of having neglected their duty of supervision," Andrei said, when asked to explain on what basis the Russian government might take his children into custody. "This means that lesbian couples could even have their biological children taken away because, through their lifestyle choices, they propagate "certain values."

Yevgeny also explained the events that led to the couple's harrowing escape "I was alone in Moscow at that time. A week after Andrei and the children had left the country, there was a knock on my door, but nobody called 'police, open up.' After half an hour the violent knocking stopped. My parents' home was searched. They were looking for the children and our Danish marriage certificate because we got married in Denmark in 2016. My friends then got me out of the country."

Read the full interview here.

Gay Dad Life

New Zealand Member of Parliament Becomes First-Time Gay Dad

Tāmati Coffey, a member of New Zealand's Parliament, just welcomed a son with his husband Tim Smith.

New Zealand Labour MP (Member of Parliament) Tāmati Coffey and his husband Tim Smith became first-time dads on July 10, 2019 when they welcomed their son Tūtānekai Smith-Coffey via surrogate. Needless to say, the dads are overjoyed to finally become parents.

Tāmati, MP for the Waiariki electorate and former TV weatherman, and his husband Tim, a former music teacher from Northern England, had a civil union in 2011 and have been together 10 years. Fatherhood had been "a long time coming," Tāmati had said when he announced that he and Tim were expecting at Auckland's Big Gay Out.

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Gay Dad Life

How Canada's 'Gay Dollar' Helped This Gay Man Reflect on His Biggest Regret—Not Having Kids

Canada unveiled a 'gay dollar' coin earlier this year, helping Gregory Walters reflect on the progress the LGBTQ community has made—and his decision to forgo having children children

Earlier this year, Canada unveiled a rainbow-stripped coin dollar to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the country's decision to decriminalize homosexuality. With the coins now firmly in circulation, Gregory Walters, who lives in Vancouver, wrote a moving essay for the Globe and Mail, expressing joy for how far Canada has come on the issue of gay rights, but how the coin is also a symbolic representation of the "greatest regret" of his life—his decision not to adopt children.

Gregory writes that he had hoped to adopt a child ever since his early career working with persons with developmental disabilities. "Several children I worked with were wards of the State of Texas," he wrote. "Their parents having relinquished all rights either owing to egregious acts of abuse or a lack of desire to raise someone with so many needs. There were days when I felt, 'If I could just take you home and raise you.' I knew there was a need for adopting persons with special needs but my own internalized homophobia got in the way yet again. Despite what is probably my own gift in working with children, I never felt worthy enough to be a parent. I always felt that if I were a gay dad it would create more of a liability for the child."

Gregory decision to forgo having children, he says, is his "greatest regret." While he takes responsibility for some of this decision, he also adds: "society's view of homosexuals and its opinions regarding gay adoptions also played a major part."

To critics of Canada's coin, some of who have said its a cheap political pander to the LGBTQ community, Gregory concludes with this thought:

"I don't care if the indulged majority who never had to question marriage or raising children or being secure in a job may feel the coin is frivolous. The coin isn't for them in the first place. It's an acknowledgment for those of us who repressed our true selves and felt oppressed. It is for gays who never lived to see rights and protections enshrined in law. It is for younger LGBTQ people to learn more about how far we've come and to gain a deeper sense of gay pride. For these reasons, the coin has value so much greater than any monetary designation. The coin represents both empowerment and normalization."

Read Gregory's full essay here.

Gay Dad Family Stories

Boston Will Always Have a Special Place in the Hearts of These Gay Dads

Matt and Rej met in Boston and got engaged in Fenway Park. The latest chapter of their fairytale Beantown romance? Fatherhood.

Husbands Matt Ottaviani and Rej Gareau met in Boston in 2013 via OKCupid. A couple years later, the two returned to get engaged in Fenway Park. And in the latest chapter in their fairytale Beantown romance, it's also where they would begin the process of becoming dads with the help of Circle Surrogacy.


Matt and Rej dated for a short time while they were both living in Boston. Once Rej's studying was complete, he returned to Canada (where he is from) and they continued their relationship long distance. In a little under a year, Matt followed his heart to Ottawa. Together they braved the cold, bought a house, and got married in October 2015, following a proposal at Fenway Park orchestrated by Rej, and including friends and family. Their loved ones watched as Rej got down on one knee on the baseball field, and asked Matt to marry him.

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Gay Dad Life

New Book Explores How Two 'Broken Souls' Met on Craigslist, Fell in Love, and Started a Family

Nick and Bryan had both almost "given up," until they met each other through a Craigslist ad.

Guest post written by Nick He, authors of "Two Dads and Three Girls"

My name is Nick. I am 100% made in China. Growing up in China, being gay was not an option. I was denied a chance to be myself. Thanks to the Chinese education system, I also was not encouraged to seek my true self. Everyday, I was told to study, get a good score, go to a college, and to make my parents proud.

Growing up in Seattle, Bryan's happy family life was shattered by his parent's divorce. He quit college and worked in a local grocery store for 18 years. He knew that he liked boys when he was little, but chose to live a faked straight life.

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Gay Dad Life

"Over the Moon": Congrats to Gay Dads on May Births and Adoptions!

Join us in congratulating all of the gay men in our community whose families grew in the Month of May!

Wishing all of these gay dads congratulations on their exciting news this month. From pregnancy announcements, to becoming first-time dads, congrats to everyone in our community on their recent births and adoptions!

Circle Surrogacy is the proud sponsor of May's Congrats post. They were founded in 1995 on the belief that everyone should have the opportunity to be a parent. "For over 20 years we've helped LGBTQ+ couples and singles around the world fulfill their dreams of parenthood. We've helped bring more than 1,900 babies into this world... and counting!"

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Gay Dad Family Stories

Triple the Fun (and Diapers): Chris and Shimon, on Life With Their Triplets

When their triplets were born via surrogacy, Chris and Shimon's doctor said he'd never had so many people in one delivery room

Chris Corbett was on holiday in South Africa when Shimon Bobbout first saw him. "I was with a group of friends," recalled Shimon, "and as soon as he walked in, all of us literally looked at each other and said, 'Who's the dish?'" The two clicked right away.

Chris, who was based in Sydney, was in South Africa visiting his mom. Shimon and Chris enjoyed a holiday romance that resulted in a very special simultaneous connection. "I had mentioned to Chris that I was looking to start a family, thinking at the back of my mind that he would run for the hills," said Shimon. "However, he totally surprised me with such support and shared that he had the exact same intensions."

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Personal Essays by Gay Dads

This Guy Refused to Wait for His Prince Charming Before Becoming a Dad

Most coverage of LGBTQ parents features couples, says our new blogger Steven Kerr. As a single man, that doesn't represent his experience.

I sat nervously in the car with my mother and father. It had taken almost four years to arrive at this moment. I had parked just around the corner from the convent, knowing that in just a few minutes I would meet my new daughter for the very first time.

I received the call two days prior. I had been shopping in the centre of town when I saw the missed call just as my phone died. I rushed home to plug in the phone and access the voicemail. It was June 2009.

"Hello Steven. This is Teresa from the adoptions department. We have an 'indecent' proposal for you. Can you come in before 2pm to discuss?".

I looked at my watch. It was 1:45pm. I drove like a madman retracing my steps back to the council offices to receive their proposal.

Now three days later sitting in my small, black Fiat Punto, I was nervously trying to get my head around the events of the past 48 hours, yearning to hold my daughter in my arms for the first time.

Little did I know that the nuns had no plans on handing over my daughter that morning…

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Fatherhood, the gay way

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