Gay Dad Life

Rehoboth Beach Dads Cory and Jeffrey: "Love is Love"

This guest post was written by Michael Cook and originally published on the Huffington Post as Rehoboth Beach, Delaware’s Cory Garrett Rose & Jeffrey Harrison Rose: “Love Is Love; Be An Example.”

The question “what makes a family” seems to pop up frequently on the evening news, but Cory Garrett Rose and Jeffrey Harrison Rose could be an example for many to follow. Raising daughter Beverly together in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, they are an active part of a vibrant beach town that melds both the heterosexual and LGBT parts of the community almost seamlessly.

Making Beverly their top priority, yet keeping their own distinct interests, Cory and Jeffrey sat down for a chat with me to talk about the joys of parenthood, and what it’s like to raise their daughter in Rehoboth Beach. Most of all, Cory and Jeffrey show one of the biggest keys of parenthood is, in their own words, “a happy parent is a good parent”.

Jeffrey Harrison Rose and Cory Garrett Rose with their daughter Beverly

What was it like when you and your husband first decided that you would take the plunge into parenthood? Was it a hard or a long drawn out decision?

It was more a coincidence of timing and fate, really. We went to a party, talked with a friend who revealed to us he was expecting a child via egg donation and surrogacy. His success motivated us to call his surrogacy agency, and their phone number was literally placed into our hands. It was a now-or-never kind of feeling. That time in our lives was perfect. Thirteen months after making the initial call, Beverly was born.

What is it like raising your child in an LGBT community like Rehoboth Beach? Do you think it would be difficult in a less accepting community of just different?

The acceptance in a place like Rehoboth Beach makes it much easier. We like living here because two guys raising a child together isn’t much of a novelty or oddity, as it may be in a more isolated community.

Is parenthood everything you expected or different? How so?

We anticipated parenthood to be tough at times, but it is more challenging than expected in that it’s a lot of constant effort that offers very little downtime. It continues to be a wonderful experience for us both, and we love sharing our lives with this precious child who we created, together.

How do you and your husband balance a social life with friends with the responsibilities that come with parenthood?

We’ve balanced our social lives with the responsibilities that come with parenthood by making Beverly a part of them. We take turns, compromise, and have a supportive family who love to help with Beverly when needed or not. As long as we get our gym time in, and at least one night out with friends, we’re happy! A happy parent is a good parent. You can’t be a prisoner of your child. It is important to retain part of your individuality, and frequently revisit yourself.

What are some of your favorite things about being dads?

Her innocence, and how she trusts us to protect and take care of her. The giggles, and her little voice when she says, “I love you, Daddy and Poppy!” But more so the creation of life and watching that life unfold and mature. It’s the shared experience that all parents have, you just have to go through it.

Ok now is the time to gush about your gorgeous daughter; have at it!

Everyone believes their child is special. I don’t know where to start. It’s an honor to know her, let alone be her fathers; she brings out the best in us.

What is it like to see LGBT parenthood become part of the lexicon and part of the conversation now? It is much more common and accepted than it used to be.

The lexicon is slowly changing. While much more common, it’s still awkward. Some people are still making ignorant assumptions, and ask very inappropriate questions like “How did you get a white one?” “Whose sperm did you use?” “Who plays the Mommy?” We try not to judge, but rather educate. The understanding of what a family is, and the ways a family can become is still beyond some people’s capacity for respect. For a gay couple to have a baby requires PERMISSION, takes time, thought, and money. Some people just have a one night stand, others, like us, undergo psychiatric analysis.

What does “pride” mean to you and your husband? And how do you pass that down to your daughter?

We all know what pride means. I think it’s the matter and importance of having pride rather than of how one interprets the word. For us, we’re proud to be part of a family, regardless of whether it’s same sex, opposite sex, single parent, adoption, IVF/surrogacy, whatever. Love is love; be an example.

What are your biggest hopes both for your own daughter as well as for the other LGBT parents of children?

Our biggest hope for Beverly is that she live happily, and unapologetically, having the freedom and pride to be her most true self, and that she find someone who sees beauty in all forms of love to share her life with.

Show Comments ()
Gay Dad Life

8 Ways for Dads to Find Work/Life Balance

Finding work/life balance is hard enough... but can be even harder for gay dads.

Having kids is an amazing part of life, and it should be fun. Life does tend to get in the way sometimes, and one huge aspect of that is work. Striking that balance between work and home life is tough. If you both work it's even harder.

And if you're a gay couple, it can have it's own set of problems above and beyond the standard work-life issues that people face. Recently, the Harvard Business Review conducted a study that focused specifically on the experiences of same-sex couples who wanted to make moves towards a work/life balance.

Keep reading... Show less
Gay Dad Life

'NolaPapa' Launches YouTube Channel: Story of a Gay Dad

Check out Erik Alexander's new YouTune Channel: Story of a Gay Dad

When we first found out that our second daughter was African American I froze. Not because of her race, but because I knew NOTHING about African American hair. So I frantically tried to learn as much as I could while she was a newborn so I was ready to style it when she was a little older.

I decided to launch our YouTube channel Nolapapa: Story of a Gay Dad to focus on this very topic! Episodes 1-5 will solely be dedicated to learning how to wash, care for and styling African American hair. Afterwards, the content will shift towards personal & family situations, adoption, gay parenting questions and other great content! I'd love your support and become part of our little village as we launch this new project!

Sending Nola love to each of ya!

Keep reading... Show less
Gay Dad Life

Encouraged by His Son, Single Dad Richard Started Dating Again — and Just Got Married!

After his 14 year relationship ended, Richard got a gentle push into the dating pool from an unexpected source — his son!

In 2014, Richard Rothman's relationship of 15 years ended, leaving him understandably reluctant to jump back into the world of dating as a single gay dad. But after spending one too many Friday nights at home, he got a gentle nudge from somebody unexpected —his teenaged son, Jonathan.

"Dad," Jonathan said. "Would you just get out of the house and go on a date already?" (You may remember wise-beyond-his-years Jonathan from this post that went viral of a tattoo he got commemorating his adoption day.)

On his son's encouragement, Richard started dipping a tentative toe back into the dating pool. In 2015, he met Kevin thanks to mutual friends that introduced them via social media. It took four months before Richard introduced Kevin to his son, who was a Sophomore in high school at the time.

On New Year's Eve in 2017, Kevin proposed while the couple was vacationing in Palm Springs. The city has an outdoor festival every year, he explained, which the couple attended. The band Plain White T's happened to be performing their hit "Hey There Delilah" as Kevin got down on one knee and proposed. "Now whenever I hear that song it brings back memories of that night," Richard said.

Richard and Kevin married on March 30, 2019 back at the scene of the crime — in Palm Springs, at the Frederick Loewe Estate. Jonathan was Richard's best man, and also walked him down the aisle (awwww.....). Kevin's brother Bobby served as his best man.

"As so many wonderful moments continue to happen for us in Palm Springs, we now own a home there in addition to our primary residence in Bentonville, Arkansas," said Richard.

Check out video from the couple's special day below!

And Jonathan is now an E4 Master-at-Arms in the US Navy.

Surrogacy for Gay Men

A Dream Becomes Reality, After a Men Having Babies Conference

New Yorkers David and Brian said their dreams of fatherhood crystalized only after receiving a "ton of information" at a Men Having Babies conference.

New Yorkers David F.M. Vaughn 39, and Brian Becker, 37, are new dads. Over the past three months, the two most important things they've learned as fathers is "patience, and how to swaddle LIKE A CHAMP!" David and Brian chose surrogacy as their path to fatherhood, but making that decision was one of the more difficult parts of their journey. Brian's siblings are adopted, and while they still want to make adoption part of their family journey, certain opportunities arose that made their surrogacy decision easier. Brian's sister enthusiastically offered to be their gestational surrogate, and they discovered more about the process with the help of Men Having Babies (MHB).

But let's jump back to the beginning of their story.

Keep reading... Show less

Your Foster Adopt Questions Answered by a Foster Adopt Dad

We asked our Instagram community to send us their questions about being a foster dad — and an experienced foster dad responded.

Dad Joseph Bostick (read his story here) recently shared his experience as a foster and adoptive dad with our Instagram community via a question and answer session - did you feel nervous at the beginning? How did you start the process? Did you always know that you wanted to foster older kids?

Read Joseph's responses below.

Keep reading... Show less

Gay Surrogacy in the U.S. for International Dads

Kristin Marsoli of Circle Surrogacy breaks down the process of surrogacy for gay men outside of the United States

Written by Circle Surrogacy & Egg Donation, who has been helping international gay men become dads for over two decades.

Becoming a gay dad through a surrogacy agency in the U.S. – when you live outside of the United States – can feel overwhelming. You may have questions such as: Why should I come all the way to the US for surrogacy? What do I need to know as an international intended parent? How do I get my baby home?

We spoke with Circle Surrogacy & Egg Donation who has been working with international gay parents for over two decades. Circle Surrogacy was founded by a gay dad and lawyer, and is the most successful surrogacy agency with a full legal team on staff who are experts working with international parents.

Keep reading... Show less
Coming Out

My Gay Shame Is Officially Cancelled

After years of feeling ashamed of being gay, David Blacker has finally overcome it. And his son had a lot to do with it.

Scrolling through my social media feeds, reading all the posts about National Coming Out Day reminds me just how valuable it is for us to share our stories and be as open, vulnerable and authentic as possible. Warning: this article is about to get real AF, so now might be a good time to switch back to the Face-Aging app that gives Russia all your personal data.

Oh good, you stayed. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Keep reading... Show less

Fatherhood, the gay way

Get the latest from Gays With Kids delivered to your inbox!

Follow Gays With Kids

Powered by RebelMouse