Change the World

Which Companies Made the "Nice" List This Year for LGBTQ Family Leave Policies?

Apple and Home Depot made the "Nice" list. McDonalds and Walgreens, though, have been naughty.

PL+US, an organization dedicated to bringing about high-quality paid family leave for everyone in the United States, recently released its 2018 report card of companies in the United States. And it looks like quite a few new organizations have been particularly good this year,

As the report notes: "the private sector has reached a tipping point on paid family leave. In 2018 alone, 20 companies introduced new paid leave policies. A whopping 72% of surveyed companies provide paid leave equally to moms, dads, and adoptive parents and more than half are equal for all employees, whether salaried, hourly, or part-time."

Just two years ago, when PL+US first conducted an analysis of the country's largest employers, most companies refused to disclose details on their family leave policies. Those that did often excluded benefits for LGBTQ people, adoptive parents, and low-wage workers.

In just two short years, PL+US has worked with advocates and workers all across the country to help change the policies of 30 of the country's top employers.

Employers with the most high-quality leave policies include: Apple, Verizon, the Home Depot and H&M. The naughty list includes employers such as McDonalds, Albertsons and Walgreens.

Check out the full report card here.

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Change the World

In the Philly Area? Attend 'Family Pride' On October 5th!

Philadelphia Family Pride is hosting their 10th Annual "Family Matters" Conference on October 5th for LGBTQ parents, prospective parents, and their kids!

Guest post by Stephanie Haynes, the executive director of Philadelphia Family Pride

On Saturday, October 5, 2019, Philadelphia Family Pride will hold their 10th Annual Family Matters Conference from 9am to 3:30pm for LGBTQ parents, prospective parents and their kids of all ages at the University of the Sciences in West Philadelphia. The theme this year is "Telling Our Stories." Registration is now open!

In an interactive keynote, Anndee Hochman, author of the Philadelphia Inquirer's weekly "Parent Trip" column, will share highlights from her work as a journalist and memoirist. She'll invite conversation about the stories that shape us—what tales do we share? who does the telling? who is left out?—and how those stories, added up, are changing the world. Read her bio.

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Eight years ago, Biff and Trystan's fatherhood journey began when they received a somewhat unexpected call. Biff's sister was no longer able to take care of her two kids, and they wanted to know if Biff and Trystan could look after them. Overnight, the one-time uncles quickly transitioned into the role of dads to Biff's niece and nephew. Six years later, they expanded their family when they welcomed their son Leo, carried by trans dad Trystan.

Trystan and Biff had two different paternity leave situations when they grew their family, and those experiences shaped how they feel about paid paternity leave today.

"I had no parental leave that I could take when we became parents overnight," said Trystan. "I basically ended up depleting basically every single day I had ever accrued... just to take care of them." Biff, for his part, was given no time off, except for a half day here and there for court days.

When it came to Leo, the son Trystan carried, Trystan was initially given six weeks off. "It was really paltry," Trystan said. "I sat down with the board and said ... the parental leave policy you have is not in line with the values of this organization." The board fortunately listened, and doubled Trystan's parental leave to three months to give him time to care for and bond with Leo.

"Parental leave is really important, because when you have a new baby or when you adopt kids, especially when you adopt kids, there's an adjustment period," Biff said, which goes beyond just the need for the gestational parent to recover, physically.

"Those first few months are building a foundation for the rest of your life as a family," Trystan added. "If we want dads to be equally involved in raising kids, contributing to a household, being part of family, we have to give them the opportunity to do that in the very beginning.

If you believe *ALL* dads should receive paid paternity leave, sign the Paternity Leave Pledge.

Watch their story:

Sign the pledge: www.dovemencare.com/pledge

Change the World

There's No "LGBT Way" to Change a Diaper, Says America's First Gay Dad Governor

Jared Polis, the first openly gay male Governor of a state, talks to POPSUGAR about how being a dad has impacted his policy priorities

Colorado Governor Jared Polis recently say down with POPSUGAR for an interview to talk politics, family life, and what it's like being the first openly gay man to ascend to a state's top executive role.

Though this is a historic moment for the LGBTQ community, and gay dads in particular, Governor Polis says the act of parenting his two children with a male partner, Marlon Reis, doesn't change all that much . Or, as he more succinctly put it, "there's no LGBT way to change a kid's diaper. Or dress your kid for school."

His experience as a parent, though, has impacted some of his policy priorities. "My vision for Colorado is about making Colorado more livable for all families," Polis told POPSUGAR. One of the primary ways he hopes to do so is through family-friendly education policies, like early childhood education.

"The data always pointed to the importance of early childhood education," he says in the interview. "But now as a father of a 7-year-old and a 4-year-old, I really see it in my own kids. I see the difference that preschool and kindergarten can make and how fortunate I am to have been able to afford that for my kids."

Governor Polis is also interested in enacting paid family leave policies that are more inclusive of dads. "We want our state to be the best state to raise a family," he said. "Part of that is making sure new parents can be with their kids in those precious first few weeks that you never get back."

Read the entire interview here.


'Life Is Amazing': Congrats to Gay Dads Whose Families Recently Grew!

Help us congratulate gay dads on their recent births and adoptions last month!

Wishing all of these gay dads whose families expanded in the last month or so a lifetime of happiness! Congrats to everyone in our community on their recent births and adoptions!

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Personal Essays by Gay Dads

We Gained a Son Through Foster Care — He Didn't Lose his Family

Foster-adopt expert Trey Rabun writes a moving essay about his own experiences as a parent in the foster care system.

My husband, Phil, and I talked about having children since out first date over 11 years ago. Like many other gay dads, we waited to start the journey to become parents until we felt secure with our careers, finances, and home life. This meant we didn't start the partnering journey until 2016 when we were eight years into our relationship.

When we first met, I was completing my graduate studies in social work and subsequently started a career working in foster care and adoption. This made our decision to pursue foster care-adoption as our path to parenthood a fairly easy one. In fact, I can't recall us discussing other avenues to parenthood, but I'm sure we briefly discussed them before solidifying our decision to become foster parents.

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Gay Adoption

5 Things to Keep in Mind When Preparing for Your Home Study

Molly Rampe Thomas of Choice Network lists the 5 things gay men should keep in mind when preparing for your home study

The homestudy is the first step in the adoption process. In every state the homestudy is done a little differently, but all of them have the some combo of paperwork, trainings, and interviews. The homestudy can take anywhere from 2 months to 6 months to complete. Without it, you cannot adopt.

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Gay Dad Life

'NolaPapa' Launches YouTube Channel: Story of a Gay Dad

Check out Erik Alexander's new YouTune Channel: Story of a Gay Dad

When we first found out that our second daughter was African American I froze. Not because of her race, but because I knew NOTHING about African American hair. So I frantically tried to learn as much as I could while she was a newborn so I was ready to style it when she was a little older.

I decided to launch our YouTube channel Nolapapa: Story of a Gay Dad to focus on this very topic! Episodes 1-5 will solely be dedicated to learning how to wash, care for and styling African American hair. Afterwards, the content will shift towards personal & family situations, adoption, gay parenting questions and other great content! I'd love your support and become part of our little village as we launch this new project!

Sending Nola love to each of ya!

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Fatherhood, the gay way

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