We adopted our son when he was 9 months old. Already he had personality – he was outgoing, charming and engaging. He had a game of seeking out a stranger's attention, usually while on a bus or subway, actively looking to get noticed. When he succeeded, he looked away, all shy. Then, after a beat, turned back and gave the cutest smile. Flirting shamelessly and he wasn't even a year old!
Always with women. And so we quickly discovered that he was interested in 3 things: boobs, cars and hockey. Three things his gay dads know nothing about.
Invariably when a female relative or friend would visit, she was wearing a v-neck shirt or sweater. And invariably our son's hand would pull open that v-neck or his hand would go right in.
Cars - he demonstrated his interest by pointing at each one and made noises as they passed. My knowledge of cars is limited to their colours (as in to answer, when people asked about what kind of car was this or that, a meagre "uh…it was blue?"). With our son, I was sure that he already grasped the company, model, engine and added capabilities of each car and that his first words would be something about transmission.
And hockey – sure, it’s our national sport (here in Canada) and one I even “played” as a child. (I don’t remember much, but there is a photo or two of me posing in my gear.) He wanted a hockey stick and once he learned to walk, he was shooting a little foam-padded puck with his new foam-padded stick from Santa.
Already I could foresee early mornings at arenas watching him skate while being forced to make conversation with other parents. Gangs of teenage boys gathering at our house to talk of cars and the eye rolling when I contribute to the conversation an observation of the choice of a neighbour's new smoky taupe car. And women – some of our very best friends are women, of course, but friends…
Still, our son is our son, his own package with his own likes and dislikes. We'll nurture his interests and we'll introduce him to ours (he hasn't really mastered jazz hands yet, no matter how many times I've shown him). And hopefully we'll learn more about him and the things he likes as we go. He has so much to teach us.