Gay Dad Photo Essays

Celebrate Mother's Day This Year by Checking Out These Fabulous Lesbian Insta-Mom Accounts

Most of our content focuses on gay, bi and trans dad. But this Mother's Day, we're bringing you ten two-mom families worth following on Instagram.

Although the majority of our content focuses on gay, bi and trans dads and dads-to-be, we're always excited for Mother's Day. It's when we get to show our love for all of the AMAZING sister-accounts out there that celebrate lesbian moms!

This Mother's Day, we asked a few of our fav two-mom Instagram accounts how they celebrate the special day, what they love most about being a mom, and what they've learned in the process.

Be sure to follow these awesome lesbian and bi women celebrating all things motherhood on Instagram.


"Being mamas has taught us to slow down and be patient, dance a little more" 

Saci and Jessica grew their family through known sperm donor home insemination. "It was important to us that our baby be half Black -- like Mommie Saci -- and that our child be able to mee the man when he's grown up, if he chooses."

On motherhood:

"Being mamas has taught us to slow down and be patient, dance a little more, and also how important family is to us - from our siblings to parents and even grandparents, Jai has brought such a light to our family and we are so thankful for our dude."

Follow the Duncan Minor family

***

"Our daughter has strengthened our relationship as we communicate more"

Nyesha (Uma) and Samantha (Umi) had been together for seven years before welcoming daughter Abigail. "Samantha talked about children at the beginning of our relationship and while I told her I definitely wasn't ready, she understood but made it a non-negotiable that kids would be in the future." It was around year six when they both began sharing their feelings and jointly decided that a baby was part of their future. "We always knew she would get pregnant first so after many doctors visits and with a known donor we made it happen in 2018."

How this family celebrates Mother's Day

"Last year we shared gifts as a two-mom squad and spent the day at home with our baby. We embraced the wonderful calls and texts from our friends and family but it was nothing big since our daughter was only 3 months at the time. We did buy one another big gifts for the special day and both agreed that it was the last time we'd get a big gift just on Mother's Day.

We celebrate Mother's Day every day, we praise Abigail and are always thankful for her exciting presence."

Follow Umi and Uma here

***

"Motherhood really helps you focus on what's important in life" 

From the moment Que and Jamilla met, Que made it clear that motherhood was something very important to her. "I always knew despite what my outward appearance may suggest to others, it was important for me to carry our child." Although the path to parenthood was not an easy one for the wives, they wouldn't change a thing. "We appreciate each day we get to spend with one another and are so thrilled about our second Mother's Day!"

The most important lesson these moms have learned...

"Harper teaches me every day to laugh! As long as we are healthy and happy, everything else will work itself out. She is so happy and fun loving. We hope she always retains her humor."

Follow Jamilla and Que here.

***

"We forever have little friends and people that love us" 

Candice and Cynthia are new moms to triplets through ART. Candice has teenage daughter from a previous marriage and thought she was done having more children. After the two met, they realized they wanted children together, especially because Cynthia had never had any experience with babies and raising them since birth. "So after doing some research, we decided to give it a shot and attempted artificial insemination. On our first attempt, we ended up pregnant and with the biggest shock of our lives, we were pregnant with triplets."

The most important lesson they've learned as moms

"Sometimes you have to take things one day at time and your kids are always going to surprise you -- good and bad -- so be prepared."

***

"The most wonderful thing about motherhood is feeling like I have a purpose in life now" 

Once moms Sondra Rae and Missy decided they wanted to bring children into the world, they decided to take the IUI route. "It took us months find the perfect donor and a doctor we adored." They experienced one failed attempt before becoming pregnant with their second IUI. "We are so thankful for our journey and wouldn't want to change it!"

The most wonderful thing about motherhood...

"Is feeling like I have a purpose in life now. Plus being able to see their smiles and personalities come through is amazing. I could be extremely exhausted but looking at them brings me so much joy."

Follow Sondra Rae and Missy

***

"Motherhood has shown us what is really important and what to focus on in life" 

Moms Christina and Katie chose Reciprocal IVF to make their family. Katie carried Christina's egg and they used a donor's sperm. "We chose this route because we could both physically be part of the process."

How this family celebrates Mother's Day

"We make breakfast as a family then get outside for a hike or time at the park. We try to be outside and active as much as possible."

"Motherhood has taught us perspective. It's shown us what is really important and what to focus on in life. We don't waste our time worrying about things that don't positively affect our family."

Follow Christina and Katie here.

***

"Slow down and take time to enjoy the slow moments... because the years go by way too fast" 

Angel and Leah has been together for 10 years before they got married, and were married for another 7 before they had kids. "We explored both foster to adopt and private adoption, spent hours scouring sperm bank catalogs for the perfect donor -- we wanted a Chinese donor and there aren't many to choose from -- and then, to our surprise, Angel's brother agreed to be our donor!" On their 10th try and first round of IVF, they became pregnant with twins who came out looking like both of them.

What has been the best thing about motherhood?

"Watching these tiny humans we created become their own individuals. We love to give them opportunities to explore new places through travel, and there's nothing better than watching their eyes light up when they experience something new for the first time!"

Follow Leah and Angel here.

***

"Motherhood is not something we take for granted"

Raffinee and Micaela decided to use an anonymous sperm donor and IUI to get pregnant. Micaela got pregnant with their eldest first after four trials of IUI. Shortly after -- very shortly after -- Raffinnee became pregnant with twins after five IUI attempts. "Our children are 7.5 months a part, so for a few months out of the year we have three children the same age that are not triplets!"

What have you learned since become a mom?

"Motherhood is not something we take for granted. Like most members of our LGBTQ+ community we had to work hard to come into motherhood! After many doctors visits, months of waiting and many tries later we became moms and our worlds were forever changed.

Becoming mothers has been our greatest adventure together. It has surpassed all expectations in almost every way imaginable. Motherhood has taught me so many things but I think what stands out the most is selfless, unconditional love. Having to show up even when you are sick or exhausted was a tough lesson for me to learn at first! When I'm sick I just want to sleep and that is no longer possible, haha! This is truly a love unlike any I have ever known and I'm continually surprised by how much these little have shaped me as a person."

Follow Raffinee and Micaela here.

***

"Our Mother's Days are basically about enjoying being together" 

America and Briana's path to motherhood was somewhat unexpected. "We married each other knowing neither of us wanted children; we were totally okay with being furbaby moms only." But in during their 12th year together -- their second married -- Briana was bit by the baby bug. Hard!

"After a lot of discussion and soul searching, we decided we were going to try to have a baby! Bri was on board to carry our baby, something I (America) never had a desire to do."

They found their sperm donor and decided to try home insemination. "You know how they say third times the charm? Yeah, she got pregnant on our third try, so we were very lucky."

How this family celebrates Mother's Day

"This year is our third Mother's Day with William. Because it's a day for both of us, we try to sprinkle the day with things that make us happy, with treats we both love. So far, this has included getting our favorite hand-crafted donuts, making art with our son's hands and footprints, beach walks, brunch out, napping together and cooking together. This year we're planning on planting tomatoes and finger painting wooden signs for our garden, and see whatever else the day brings. Our Mother's Days are basically about enjoying being together."

Follow America and Briana here.

***

"It's an amazing feeling when you see your children happy!" 

Denise and Ebony both chose the path of fertility treatments to have their children. Through using an open ID sperm donor, Ebony became pregnant via IUI and Denise became pregnant with twins via IVF.

What have you learned since become a mom?

"The most important lesson we've learned from our kids, specifically from our daughter, is to live in the present moment. Our kids are growing up so fast, so we have to be fully present in order to not miss anything."

Follow Denise and Ebony here.

***

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Race

How a White Gay Dad Discusses Racial Issues with his Black Sons

In light of the recent killing of George Floyd by the hands of police in Minneapolis, Joseph Sadusky shares two excerpts from his book that deal directly with issues around raising black sons.

Editor's Note: In light of George Floyd's death, this month, author Joseph Sadusky — who has been sharing excerpts from his book Magic Lessons: Celebratory and Cautionary Tales about Life as a (Single, Gay, Transracially Adoptive) Dad each month —will share two posts that deal directly with issues around raising black sons. This is the first, titled "White," which looks at general questions that come up for a white dad raising black boys. Read previous installments here.

It may be presumptuous for a Caucasian gay man to claim to feel terrified and heartsick at the shooting of Trayvon Martin. But upon hearing the news that day in 2012, this is exactly how I felt.

The horrible truth is that there are many incidents of racial violence toward black males that I could use as starting points for this topic. But the specific case of Trayvon Martin—whose only crime was being a young black male wearing a hoodie, walking in a neighborhood where he had a home—has a particular resonance for me. Whatever the legalities of George Zimmerman using a gun to "stand his ground" if he felt his life was threatened, the simple truth is that he chose—against the direction of law enforcement, whom he contacted for support—to follow an African American male who had every right to be walking those neighborhood streets, however "thug" he might appear.

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Become a Gay Dad

Curious About Covid 19's Impact on Foster Care and Adoption?

Leading industry experts answer questions from queer men about the impact of Covid-19 on the adoption and foster care processes.

Recently, GWK hosted a series of free webinars with leading experts led by industry experts in the fields of adoption and foster care to learn about up-to-date insights on how the coronavirus affects family building. The presentations left lots of room for audience Q&A, to allow participants to get their individual questions answered — there were some common questions raised during each webinar, however, so we've put together a quick video of our experts answering some of the top concerns from queer men interested in pursuing surrogacy.

Our team of experts include:

Have other questions about the impact of the coronavirus on adoption or foster care that you'd like our experts to answer? Be sure to email us at dads@gayswithkids.com.

Surrogacy for Gay Men

Top 5 Questions About Covid-19's Impact On Surrogacy

Leading industry experts answer questions from queer men about the impact of Covid-19 on the surrogacy process.

Recently, GWK hosted a series of free webinars with leading experts led by industry experts in the field of surrogacy to learn about up-to-date insights on how the coronavirus affects family building. The presentations left lots of room for audience Q&A, to allow participants to get their individual questions answered — there were some common questions raised during each webinar, however, so we've put together a quick video of our experts answering some of the top concerns from queer men interested in pursuing surrogacy.

Our team of experts include:

Have other questions about the impact of the coronavirus on surrogacy that you'd like our experts to answer? Be sure to email us at dads@gayswithkids.com.

Here is a breakdown of the Top 5 Questions About Covid 19's Impact On Surrogacy. These are highlights taken from our live webinar series we held featuring: G...

Transracial Families Series

How These Dads Address White Privilege within Their Transracial Family

The "white savior" complex is real, said Andrew and Don, who are raising two Black children.

Editor's Note: This is the first in a series of ongoing posts exploring issues related to transracial families headed by gay, bi and trans men. Interested in being featured as part of the series? Email us at dads@gayswithkids.com

Andrew Kohn, 40, and his husband Donald (Don) Jones, 47, together 13 years, are two white dads raising two Black children in Columbus, Ohio. Do they stick out? Sure. Have they encountered racism? They say they haven't. "I keep waiting for the moment so that I can become my best Julia Sugarbaker," said Andrew. "I think because we're a gay couple with Black kids, we're the other-other and people don't really say things to us. We have never had people touch our kids hair or do something that was inappropriate."

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Children's Books

New LGBTQ-Inclusive Children's Book Asks: What Makes a Family?

A new children's book by Seamus Kirst follows a young girl's journey of emotional discovery after she is asked which of her two dads is her "real dad."

Editor's note: This is a guest post from Seamus Kirst, author of the new LGBTQ-inclusive children's book "Papa, Daddy, Riley."

Throughout my life, I have discovered that reading provides an almost miraculous way of changing the way I think.

There is no medium that better offers insight into the perceptions, feelings and humanity of someone who is different from us. Through reading we become empathetic. Through reading we evolve. I have often emerged from reading a book, and felt like I was changed. In that, even in this digital age, I know I am not alone.

As children, reading shapes how we see the world. The characters, places, and stories we come to love in our books inform us as to what life might offer us as we grow up, and our world begins to expand beyond our own backyards.

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Gay Dad Photo Essays

Interested in Foster Care? These Amazing Dads Have Some Advice

As National Foster Care Month comes to a close, we rounded up some amazing examples of gay men serving as foster care dads, helping provide kids with a bright future.

Every May in the United States, we celebrate National Foster Care Month. With over 437,000 children and youth in foster care, it's our honor to take a look at some of the awesome dads in our community who are opening their hearts and their homes, and providing these kids with a bright future.

Thinking about becoming a foster parent? Check out these resources here, and visit AdoptUSKids.

Meet the Foster Dads!

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Transracial Families Series

This Transracial Family Relies on a 'Support Group' of African American Women

Puerto Rican dads Ferdinand and Manuel are raising a daughter of Jamaican descent — and love to find ways to celebrate their family's diversity

Our second feature in our transracial family series. Read the first one here.

Ferdinand Ortiz, 39, and his husband Manuel Gonzalez, 38, have been together for 7 years. In 2017, they became foster dads when they brought their daughter, Mia Valentina, home from the hospital. She was just three days old at the time. On December 13, 2018, her adoption was finalized.

Mia is of Jamaican and African American heritage, and her dads are both Puerto Rican. When Manuel and Ferdinand began their parenting journey through the foster care system, they received specific training on how to be the parents of a child whose race and culture was different from their own. "We learned that it's important to celebrate our child's culture and surround ourselves with people who can help her be proud of her culture." However, as helpful as this training was, the dads agreed that it would've been beneficial to hear from other transracial families and the type of challenges that they faced.

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Fatherhood, the gay way

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