A Violent Homophobic Attack Turned This Gay Dad to Advocacy

Guest post written by Rene and Nejc

We are Rene (35) and Nejc (29) and we come from Slovenia, Europe. I was an avid athlete, a Judoist, but now I am an LGBT activist and Nejc is a writer, who published a gay autobiography called Prepovedano. He was also a participant in a reality show in Slovenia (Bar) and he is an LGBT activist too. Nejc and I met by a mere coincidence on Facebook, and already after the first phone call we realized that we are made for each other. Nejc and I have been together as couple almost one year. We think we have been joined by some energy, as we have both experienced a lot of bad things with previous relationships and now we wish to create and shape our common path.

I (Rene) have a son from a previous marriage with a woman. He is eleven years old and accepts our relationship with open hands. However, the question arises — why did I separate from my ex-wife and how did I come to the realization that I wanted a male partner?

In elementary school, I felt that I was attracted to both genders. After my divorce, I started a serious relationship with a man. The first lasted more than one year and the second almost a year. The associations were not very promising, as they were constantly benefiting from my income and they were violent towards me.

Nejc also realized his sexual orientation in the second grade of elementary school, when he was experiencing inexplicable attraction with his classmates and at first did not know what that meant. Everyone, everywhere teased him about it. Nejc already had some partners, one who caused all kinds of violence against him. Others hid lots of different secrets. Partnership is supposed to be based on trust and respect.

We also decided to create profiles on social networks, called Rainbow Kings, to help people understand that we are just like everyone else. We live like everyone else. We are not as harmful as some people think. Until people get to know someone more closely, or do not have this opportunity, they often have a bad opinion of the LGBTQ community.

A few months ago in October 2019, I suffered a brutal homophobic attack by unknown perpetrators in Murska Sobota. They called me "faggot' and caused me intense physical harm that hospitalized me. They damaged my kidney, which is no longer fully functioning, broke several ribs and caused me to have a leg problem on which I had to have a bypass inserted, otherwise I could have suffered permanent damage. The action itself has left a mark on my mental state as well, fearing that something bad might happen again. The attackers are still unknown and walking around. We believe that justice will come and that the guilty will be found and punished for the crime and the harm they have done. The whole family is still shaken and we are living in fear. It's hard to explain to my eleven-year-old son why someone would do such a thing to me, his father.

In the future, we want to get married and continue our journey together. We will continue to publish and educate people on taboo topics and share our sites with which we want to show the same-sex couple life with their child. We would also like to work and create workshops and lectures on LGBT issues and how to deal with life's problems or obstacles as an LGBT person.

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