Gay Dad Life

"Overwhelmed With Joy": Congrats to Gay Dads Whose Families Grew Last Month!

Help us congratulate gay dads whose families expanded via new births and adoptions last month!

Wishing all of these gay dads whose families expanded in the last month or so a lifetime of happiness! Congrats to everyone in our community on their recent births and adoptions!


Congratulations to dads Curtis and David on the birth of their daughter Quinn!

From very early on in their relationship - as in, on their first date - the topic of kids was discussed. Now that's it's finally happened, the new dads are beyond excited.

"We were both so overwhelmed with joy," said Curtis. "We have both wanted children for so long."

The husbands became dads through open adoption and live in Champaign, Illinois.

"Our hearts couldn't be more filled," added David.

Congratulations to dads Robert and Matt on finalizing the adoption of their daughter, Claire!

On April 9th, 2018, 1-day-old Claire was placed with her two dads, Robert and Matt, and their lives were changed forever! 7 months later, her adoption was finalized and the dads are over the moon!

"We waited so long for her to come into our lives," said Robert. "Once we had her, we knew we were meant to be her parents. When the judge made the final decree, it seemed like all the pieces fell into place for our family."

We're so happy for this Colorado forever family of three!

Congrats to dads Rubén and Borja on the birth of their son Gorka!

After 13 years together, Rubén and Borja decided to take the next steps and become dads via surrogacy in Canada! They chose Canada as it allowed them to both be listed as the legal parents on the birth certificate from the beginning, rather than the non-biological parent to have to apply to adopt their son.

On October 23, 2018, they welcomed their son Gorka in Winnipeg.

"We are really happy with our little one," shared Rubén. "It is definitely the best experience ever and the best thing that has ever happened to us during our 13 years of relationship."

"There's no words to describe how thankful we are with our surrogate, Haley," added Borja. "We believe she's an angel that gave us the greatest gift ever."

Gorka is a little international baby since he was born in Canada, and also has Mexican and Spanish passports thanks to this daddies - Rubén is Mexican, and Borja is from Spain. The family of three are also living in Amsterdam so he'll learn to speak Dutch, Spanish and English.

Congratulations to dads Graham and Andy on the birth of their son Harrison!

New dads Graham and Andy are thrilled to introduce to the world their son Harrison. Born a few days early and with the amazing strength of their surrogate, Graham's sister. "She and her family are amazing!" shared proud brother Graham.

"We both got to be in the operating room for her c-section," shared Andy, "and hearing his cry as he came into the world... my heart melts."

Congratulations to this new family of three!

Congrats to new dads Emanuel and Martin on the birth of their daughter, Michelle!

IG: @e.dalinvolsing

Swedish husbands Emanuel and Martin are thrilled to welcome their first child, Michelle, via surrogacy. She was born November 29, 2018.

"Time stopped!" shared Emanuel. "I knew then and there that this is what life is all about; you are the impossible dream that came true. I feel blessed and honored to be your father."

We're so happy for this new family of three!

Bryce and Jeffrey recently welcomed their twins! Congrats dads!

On November 27, 2018, Bryce and Jeffrey's lives were changed forever. That was the day they welcomed their twins, at 34 weeks gestation, into the world.

"The first time we held our twins, we were overcome with a sense of love that we never knew we could feel," shared Bryce. "Our hearts grew three sizes in an instant and was filled with immense love for our two babies."

"It was a culmination of years of hard work and sacrifice in order to create our family - and it made all the hard times worth it," added Jeffrey.

These new dads from Salt Lake City, Utah, hope to inspire other LGBT individuals, especially the youth that are struggling with self acceptance, that they, too, can have a family. We wish this new family of four all the very best!

Congratulations to Fernando on the birth of his daughter, Lola!

Fernando had always wanted to be a dad. "I never really listened to those warning me about how crazy or brave I was wanting to do this journey on my own and becoming a single dad," Fernando said. After living and working in LA for many years, Fernando returned to Spain, his home country, and began the surrogacy process. 11 months later, Lola was born.

"Everyone I've met during this journey has been incredibly supportive and nice; my amazing surrogate, the embryologist, the agency owner, the Airbnb hosts in the apartment I rented for a month in Portland..."

Although he's not getting much sleep these days, this has been the best decision Fernando has ever made, and 2018 the best year of his life. "Nothing will ever be comparable to the feeling of holding her for the first time and seeing the joy of my family at the hospital when they first saw her."

Charles and Thomas finalized the adoption of their daughter, Bella!

For Charles and Thomas, Christmas came a little earlier as they finalized the adoption of their daughter Bella on December 21, 2018.

"Bella's adoption was finalized today. We are now officially official. We couldn't be happier!" said Charles on Instagram.

Congratulations to this Boston forever family of three!

Congratulations to dads Jacky and Seth on welcoming daughter Amber to their family!

Jacky and Seth became dads for the second time on October 2018 when they welcomed their baby daughter Amber via surrogacy.

"We couldn't believe how beautiful she was the first time we held her in our arms. It was love at first sight!" shared Jacky.

At first, older brother Jasper was a wee bit jealous of his new sister, but now the dads say he is a loving big brother. Loads of hugs and kisses, and even helping out his dads with taking care of her!

"To be honest, we were a little worried that Jasper would feel that he was getting less attention with the arrival of our baby girl," said Jacky, "but what we've learned is that love doesn't divide, it multiples!"

"We feel as though our bond with Jasper is even stronger than ever, and Jasper is learning to love and care for his sibling is just the most endearing thing to witness," added Seth.

This family of four live in Indonesia.

Congratulations to dads Stephen and Frank on growing their family!

Frank and Stephen's family grew by one on December 17, 2018, when their son Charles ("Charlie") joined their family through adoption.

"Charlie is our second child and when we held him the first time we learned it wasn't about dividing our love between two kids," shared Stephen. "In an instant, we learned we could double the amount of love we had to give."

Charlie joins big brother Joe who is 21 months who was also adopted. This forever family of four lives outside of Boston, Massachusetts.

Dads James and Casey welcome their first daughter, Arden Rose!

In October last year, the Texan dads welcomed Arden Rose via surrogacy! Arden is the younger sister to their eldest child, 2-year-old Asher.

"We worked with an agency to find the perfect surrogates for us on both journeys," said Daddy Casey. "Our first pregnancy we transferred two embryos and both took. We were pregnant with boy and girl twins and had an uneventful pregnancy up until 23 weeks and 3 days. Our surrogate went into preterm labor and they were unable to stop the delivery of our twins."

Their twins, Avery and Asher were born at just 23 weeks. "Our tiny daughter Avery lived for two days and we spent 119 days in NICU with our amazing son Asher."

When the dads came home from the hospital with Asher in April 2017, they knew they wanted another child so they reached out to their agency almost immediately to be matched again.

"We were matched in June 2017 and transferred February 2018 and delivered our precious Arden Rose full term with no complications in October 2018. Both of our surrogates were amazing, we connected and continue to stay in touch," said James.

"Holding your newborn is always very emotional, but holding Arden Rose the first time was truly a moment of emotional relief, she was here and she was a very healthy, perfect baby girl and I could finally relax and take in the perfect moment of her skin next to mine with our hearts beating together," said Casey.

This awesome family live in New Summerfield, Texas.

Fabian and Anthony are new dads to daughter, Frankie, born via surrogacy!

Together 15 years, married for 3, Fabian and Anthony began their road to fatherhood almost 4 years ago.

"We endured lost embryos, issues with our agency - we ended up going independent - but we have the most special relationship with our surrogate and her family," shared Anthony.

On December 22, little Frankie Willow was born in Spotsylvania, Virginia.

"Holding Frankie for the first time felt like time stopped and the whole world and our difficult journey melted away," said Fabian. "The room was filled with joy and tears, it was like the biggest crescendo in the biggest ballad you've ever heard!"

Congratulations to this new family of three who live in Melbourne, Australia.

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News

Indiana Court Says Couples Using Sperm Donors​ Can Both Be Listed on Birth Certificate — But Ruling Excludes Male Couples

The 7th US Circuit Court of Appeals ruled in favor of the plaintiffs in the case, a major victory for LGBTQ parents — but the Attorney General may appeal to the Supreme Court.

On Friday, a US Circuit Court of Appeals upheld a ruling from a lower court that said that both parents in a same-sex relationship are entitled to be listed on the birth certificate — previously, the state of Indiana had required the non-biological parent within a same-sex relationship using assisted reproductive technologies to adopt their child after the birth in order to get her or his name listed on the birth certificate, a lengthy and expensive process not required of straight couples in the same situation.

It's a double standard LGBTQ parents have long been subjected to in many states across the country. So this represent a major win. As reported by CNN, this ruling "takes a lot of weight off" the shoulders of LGBTQ parents, said Karen Celestino-Horseman, a lawyer representing one of the couples in the case. "They've been living as families and wondering if this was going to tear them apart."

The 7th US Circuit Court of Appeals deliberated the case, according to CNN, for more than two and a half years, which is one of the longest in the court's history.

However, because all the plaintiffs in the case involved female same-sex couples using sperm donors, the ruling left open the similar question of parenting rights with respect to male couples. Indiana's Attorney General, moreover, may also appeal the case to the Supreme Court.

We'll be following the case closely and be sure to keep you up to date. For more on this recent decision, read CNN's article here.

Gay Dad Family Stories

This European Couple Became Dads Through a U.K.-Based Surrogacy Program

Janno, from Estonia, and Matthias, from Belgium, were accepted into the "Childlessness Overcome Through Surrogacy" Program.

Janno Talu, an accountant, and Matthias Nijs, an art gallery director, were born in different parts of Europe. Janno, 39, is from Estonia, and Matthias, 28, is from Belgium. Their paths crossed when the two moved to London, each from their different corners of the European Union.

Janno relocated to London earlier than Matthias, when he was 24, and his main reason for the move was his sexuality. "Although Estonia is considered one of the more progressive countries in Eastern Europe, when it comes to gay rights, it is still decades behind Western society in terms of tolerance," said Janno. "And things are not moving in the right direction." In 2016, same-sex civil union became legal, but the junior party in the current coalition government is seeking to repeal the same-sex partnership bill. "In addition," Janno continued, "they wish to include the definition of marriage as a union between a man and a woman in the country's constitution. Even today, there are people in Estonia who liken homosexuality to pedophilia, which is why I decided to start a new life in the UK, where I could finally be myself."

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Gay Dad Life

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As we usher in the year of rat, we asked some of our dads how they honor this special time.

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Personal Essays by Gay Dads

As a Gay Dad, What's the Impact of Letting My Son Perform Drag?

Michael Duncan was excited when his 10-year-old son asked if he could perform in drag for charity — but he also felt fear and anxiety.

As LGBT parents, we have all lived through some sort of trauma in our lives. For many it is the rejection of our family, being bullied, or abuse. We learn to be vigilant of our surroundings and often are very cautious of who we trust. As adults, we start to become watchful of how much we share and we look for "red flags" around every corner.

So, what effect does this have on our children? Does it unintentionally cause us to be more jaded with our interactions involving others? For some the answer may be a resounding "no." But as we look deeper into the situation, we often find that through survival our interactions with others have changed and we may not even realize exactly how much we are projecting on those around us.

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A Gay Chiropractor Explains Why He Came Out to His Patients

After Cameron Call, a chiropractor, came out to his family this past year, he knew he had one more step to take — he had to come out to his patients

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For years fear prevented me from embracing my truth and accepting a large part of who I am. I know I am not alone in that regard. But for so long my fear convinced me that I was. Fear is what kept me from ever telling my parents or anyone growing up that I am gay. Fear mingled with strong religious teachings, embraced at a young age, which led me to believe that I could cure myself of my attractions to the same gender. And fear is a part of what kept me in my marriage to a woman for over ten years.

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A Gay Dad Gains Clarity After a Health Scare

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Fatherhood, the gay way

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